
Zoolander No. 2 movie quotes bring all the satirical laughs back in a sequel to the 2001 comedy film following male models. Director Ben Stiller co-wrote the screenplay along with Justin Theroux, John Hamburg and Nick Stoller. Featuring oodles of celebrity cameos like the original, Zoolander No. 2 opened in theaters on February 12, 2016.
In Zoolander No. 2, male models Derek Zoolander (Ben Stiller) and Hansel (Owen Wilson) have been out of modeling for many years and living in seclusion. So when an invitation to return to the world of high fashion reunites them, they soon learn that the fashion world has changed immensely while they've been away.
Meanwhile, all the most beautiful people in the world are being murdered and left with Derek's trademark Blue Steel look on their face. To help find the person responsible, Interpol agent Valentina Valencia (Penelope Cruz) recruits Derek and Hansel. But that's not their only problem. Mugatu (Will Ferrell) is out of prison and back causing trouble again, including revenge on Derek Zoolander.
Also starring Kristen Wiig, Fred Armisen, Kyle Mooney and Benedict Cumberbatch, Zoolander No. 2 opened alongside the likes of Deadpool, Hail, Caesar!, Kung Fu Panda 3, The Finest Hours, and The Revenant.
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Toss Me the Knife
Hansel: Derek, toss me the knife.
Derek Zoolander: You got it!
Hansel: Ahhh!!
In need of a knife, Hansel asks Derek to toss him one. Derek obliges, but ends up stabbing Hansel in the leg. In Derek's defense, he did do what Hansel asked.
Prison Changed Me
Mugatu: Prison changed me! I am bad to the core now!
...
Mugatu: Todd! Where's my damn latté?
Fresh out of prison, Mugatu is a changed man. While he's a bit more hardcore now, his love for Todd and lattes is still the same.
Fashion's Changed
Hansel: Old?
Derek Zoolander: Lamé?
...
Hansel: We were a joke out there. I guess fashion's changed.
...
Don Atari: Meet the biggest supermodel in the whole world. This is All.
Derek Zoolander: Are you like a male model or a female model?
All: All is All.
Hansel: But I think he's asking, do you have a hot dog or a bun.
All: Ha ha ha, oops!
When Derek and Hansel try to return to the world of high fashion after many years away, it doesn't take long for them to realize just how much has changed. Their lack of intelligence, however, remains the same.
She's Hot. I Trust Her.
Valentina Valencia: Derek Zoolander?
Derek Zoolander: Yes
Valentina Valencia: Valentina Valencia, Interpol, Global Fashion Division
Hansel: Fashion Police? We're clean, lady. Go harass somebody else.
Derek Zoolander: Besides, I'm out of fashion.
Valentina Valencia: I need to talk to you. It has to do with the death of Justin Bieber.
Derek Zoolander: His death is not my problem.
Valentina Valencia: I can use the database at Interpol to help you find your son... If you help me.
Hansel: I think we gotta play ball with her. She's got some kind of database or something that she says will help us find little Derek, and she's hot. I trust her.
Valentina Valencia: Someone's trying to kill the world's most beautiful people. All of them died with your signature look. This is Blue Steel, right? We need you to infiltrate the world of high fashion.
Derek and Hansel are approached by Interpol agent Valentina Valencia who explains why she needs their help. Considering she's hot and has some database or something, they agree.
I Miss Not Knowing Things
Hansel: Why didn't we do this sooner?
Derek Zoolander: I thought you knew!
Hansel: I thought you knew!
Derek Zoolander: I miss not knowing things with you.
While neither Derek nor Hansel knows why they didn't reunite sooner, Derek does know one thing. He misses not knowing things with Hansel.
Give Me That Incredible Magnum
Hansel: You still got it, D-Zone. You're Derek Zoolander. You stopped a Chinese throwing star midair with a look. I was there.
Derek Zoolander: That's not me anymore.
Hansel: Yes, it is. Hey, flash me that beautiful look. Give me that incredible Magnum.
Derek Zoolander: No!
Hansel: Think fast! Magnum!
Derek Zoolander: Wait! No!
Hansel: Magnum, now! Come on! You got this but you gotta focus!
Derek Zoolander: Hansel, stop!
Hansel: Come on! You got this!
Derek Zoolander: Maybe we could try a washcloth.
Hansel: Tequila!
Derek Zoolander: Hansel, no! No, it's not working!
Hansel tries his best to get Derek back in shape after many years out of the game. While Derek once did stop a Chinese throwing star with a look, today, he's only getting hit in the face with any object Hansel can throw.
Hey, Fatlander
Little Kid: Hey, Fatlander!
Derek Zoolander: He switched the Zoo part with fat. That's how he came up with Fatlander!
Derek is appalled when a little kid calls him Fatlander instead of Zoolander. At least Derek can comprehend how the kid made that name. That counts right?
You're Asking Me Why I Killed Justin Bieber
Derek Zoolander: Why kill all those pop stars?
Mugatu: You're asking me why I killed Justin Bieber. Really?!
Just like when Derek had to ask J.P. Prewitt why male models, Derek drops another dumb question when he asks Mugatu why he killed Justin Bieber.
Closed for Business
Valentina Valencia: Be careful, he'll try to get inside your head.
Derek Zoolander: Don't worry. It's closed for business.
Valentina tries to warn Derek about Mugatu, that Mugatu will get inside Derek's head. Lucky for Derek, there's little going on inside that head for Mugatu to infiltrate.
You Really Are an Idiot
Mugatu: Derek Zoolander, I've been expecting you. I've got a nasty itch. I'd ask you to scratch it but you'd think I was just trying to trick you.
Derek Zoolander: You're trying to make me think I shouldn't help you, in which case, I should do the opposite of that and help you.
...
Derek Zoolander: Your move.
Mugatu: You really are an idiot, aren't you?
Poor Derek gets sucked right into Mugatu's reverse psychology when the two meet. Before Derek knows it, he's in chains and Mugatu is free.